2012 refletions.

what i would've written on New Year's Eve, 
had we not been traveling and minus a computer and decent internet connection.


i like to spend some time on NYE thinking about the Lord's faithfulness to us over the previous year and praying about what He has in store for the upcoming year.

this past week, 
as i've flipped back through my prayer journal, seeing all that God has done 
{and, wow, has He done so much in our lives throughout 2012!}
i read what i wrote on new year's eve, 2011:

Hebrews 10:23 says 
let us hold fast to the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful.

yes! May I hold fast this new year, because HE is faithful -
 not that our circumstances will be easy, or that we'll be healthy,
 but because He will be faithful.

I actually wrote that, folks.
{that we'll be healthy}

i think that perhaps, in some supernatural way, 
the Spirit of our Living God was preparing me for all the health situations 2012 would hold.
{though i never could've imagined them}.

Last year, I wrote about specific Memorial Stones from 2011 -
specific situations through which we will always remember 
God's specific, provisionary faithfulness in our lives.

looking back on 2012?
i kinda feel like the entire year was a testimony to God's faithfulness.

sure, i was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis.
but, so much bigger than that,
our Lord has showed up in so many ways to comfort, direct, and encourage me.
through numerous testing, numerous doctor appointments, numerous early mornings with my coffee and Bible the Lord has given me friends that have said the right thing, verses that speak deep to my darkest fears, and a husband that has been rock-solid through it all.

after Joshua and the Isrealites crossed the Jordan river, they built altars -
tangible reminders of the Lord's extreme presence in their lives.

for me?
multiple sclerosis will always be my Memorial Stone.
every time my pinky finger tingles,
every time my hand burns,
every daily injection?

it's just a tangible, physical reminder of the Lord's purpose for my life.
and a tangible, physical reminder that His purpose?
it's so much higher, so much bigger, so much better than my purposes could ever be.

no eye has seen, nor ear heard,
    nor the heart of man imagined,
what God has prepared for those who love him
i corinthians 2:9

i would like to think that 2013 will be a bit calmer, a bit more typical, and maybe even a bit boring.
i kinda don't think so, though.

through it all,
if my MS gets worse, if we deal with some brand new health issue, 
or if the Lord brings something we never would have imagined into our lives,
may we hold fast to the confession of our faith.
not because it's easy.
but because HE is faithful.

may your New Year be filled with faith and hope, too.